Updates and WORK

_{"A thousand times the worse, to want thy light.
Love goes toward love, as schoolboys from
their books,
But love from love, toward school with heavy looks." -Shakespeare}

I must say, I do love Romeo and Juliet the play. <3.


Anyway, Hello again to all.

I haven't uploaded or talked about much lately as I haven't had much time to do anything, so I thought I'd just update you all on what's been going on in my life, what I'm doing at the moment and what I am thinking about doing in the near future.

First term of year 12 started about 3 weeks ago now, it's pretty much the same as year 11 so far. The work is piling though I can tell you that, but nothing too complicated yet. So that's alright I suppose.

My English teachers made me drop Extension English because I'd be the only person in the class, and they wouldn't get the money they would be hoping to get with one student. I think this is the reason. They said that I should drop it because my marks were shit or I didn't really try hard in it or put effort in. When in fact I did and I got 90 percent's in all of my assessment tasks. Now this is odd considering I had nearly 100 percent in every task, and I did try hard all year.

So unfortunately I haven't had much motivation for writing as I feel beaten down and stupid. Not very good actually.

So that's gone then and I dropped maths aswell as I have tried for many years, have had tutors and many other things to help and it didn't improve at all. I just got people angrier with me until they were so frustrated they couldn't see where to help me next.

Enough about school, I went to a wedding last weekend with Germa's family. It was really fun and I got my first taste of champagne. I say, It tastes very nice.

Germa's birthday came and I got her a few things I like to think were very special. I got her a Severus Snape poster from Harry Potter. She absolutely loves Snape and I had the money so why not. Unfortunately I hadn't been prepared for it to arrive on the day. All that stressing! I got her some cute stickers off of Etsy and I got her a pair of butterfly earrings. Oh yeah, she got spoilt. lol

Patchy my dog isn't doing so well, he's coughing again and hasn't seemed to have stopped. I think my parents gave up on him because they don't want to pay the vet bills. Because they have other important things to pay for like alcohol or whatever. Silly addictions frustrate me. Seriously no one thinks of their children anymore. It's so annoying. Who the hell cares if you had a bad past , get some help then! it would be much cheaper than your addiction and you at least actually benefit from it.

Work.

Great my favourite subject. -insert sarcsam here-

I'm very annoyed and irritated with my job at the moment as my manager has been discriminating against me. Because I am gay. As soon as she found out "by accident" a few months back she started treating me different. No more compliments or nice friendly acts were pushed towards me from her. She alienated me from peer workers just to make sure I'm not with anyone else and she makes homophobic and racist comments about homosexual and ethnic people in general at times around the store. I do not feel comfortable with this. I feel like she was waiting for something to swing into her direction for her to kick me out or even just put me off work for as long as she could. And guess what the ball swung in to her court.

We'll just call her X from now on.


I decided to go hand in a resume at a store in my shopping centre I had been applying for, for over two years now as I hadn't been getting any shifts for weeks at a time Now I am a hard worker, I've had many authority and manager figures say that I'm one of the best workers that have worked at the store in a long time yet, perfecting many job areas like cleaning, keeping my til the same amount and giving good customer service. It was my dream job well dream part time job to work at this particular store I had handed my resume in at, I have always wanted to work there. And I finally get the chance, I rang up, asked if they were hiring and they said yes! Finally! I thought, I have a chance at perhaps getting an interview there. I thought at least I will be getting shifts if I get the job there because X, at my store was being very nasty to me and X had been talking to me in a rude manner for no reason at all and giving me all the hard jobs and expecting me to get double what the other workers were getting done in no time what so ever. X had worked the Sunday that had just went by and I was very sick that day and she worked me to the bone, letting her other younger workers that get shifts like 4 or 5 every week, sit in the back room and talk on their phones and price the whole day. They got hardly anything done and I can price a whole pallet in an hour and a half.

So I got all dressed up and nice and printed off a neat CV for the store before running in not even half an hour after I called to hand it in. The manager laughed and giggled with me, chatted and she even said that she was holding interviews just this week and that she would give me a call to set one up perhaps. I walked out very happy with myself and completely and utterly excited. I pretty much skipped to the car and jumped around when I got home.

Fast forward two days later and it was friday. I was wondering hum, I wonder if she forgot to call me considering the week has been up now. Interviews must be finished. But then I remembered I should call my current employment and check to see if I had any shifts coming the week after this. So the phone rang and X answered the phone.

I said "Hello X, How are you? It's just -my name- calling to see if I had any shifts this week."

X said "Yeah hi, oh yeah! by the way, Next time you go for an interview....and want a reference...Make sure you ASK before you put my name down!"

I said "What?"

As I hadn't put X down on my resume as one of my references and I already knew the rule about asking to use someone as a reference. I had two teachers from school as my references . The store that had called my employment and asked for X had gone through my resume to my employment page and decided to call the job I had last worked for which is where I'm still working to see how I work. But X hadn't taken that into account and had instantly thought I put her down as a reference, which I did not.

X goes on to say

"Yeah, someone rang up for you yesterday."

I said "Ah okay but-"

She cut me off before I could say anything else and told me I had no shifts and then promptly cut me off and said goodbye. I didn't even get to say goodbye before she had hung up.

So I go on to think how weird X had just acted and felt a bit scared about what X might have said to the store I had applied at considering that the woman had said she would call me and it had now been two days since. The week was up. I thought maybe I shouldn't worry about it and just leave it til the end of the weekend incase they got caught up or something.

I then go to check my bank account that friday afternoon and see that I had not been paid for my shift, the Sunday that had just passed. I thought "hum this is weird I won't call back right away because X seemed to be very spiteful towards me and I didn't want to fuel that even more.

So I call on the sunday, still no store call had came for me.

I call and one of the other employee's that work at my employment picked up and was very rude to me on the phone. I was thinking this just kept getting more odd by the second and I started to get anxious even more about the store I had handed my resume in to.

So I wait until the wednesday of that week and decide I should call the store and see what was going on with the interviews.

I asked for the manager and a guy took my details down and said she would ring me the next day as she wasn't in. I said thankyou and waited til thursday. ONLY to find out, that I hadn't been paid again. So I call that afternoon after school to see what was happening. Feeling rather irritated now, I asked nicely and got one of X's assistant managers. We'll call her Y.

Y says "sorry, I don't know what's happening with that, I'll write it down for X to see tomorrow." I said
"No problem and thanks" Before she hung up on me.

I call the store I wanted to work at and the manager now had a harsh tone towards me as she talked. Like I was nobody important now what so ever. She tells me she held the interviews already and says "not a drama" before she hung up before I could say goodbye. My heart sank and I cried for a good hour or so. Feeling like shit and feeling rejected and anxious as how am I going to save up to move out if people are sabotaging my chance at getting another job.

Another week passes and I still haven't been paid. Fuming and frustrated as hell I call up to see when I'm getting paid . A different Assistant manager ( one that I like) picks up and unfortunately feels the wrath of my rude tone. She doesn't take to heart though as I'm good friends with her and I know her through family. She tells me that she will tell X tonight and that it will be in the bank tomorrow. (the day I get paid) Finally satisfied I wait.

Thursday comes and I hadn't been paid. It had now been 2 weeks since my last shift, nearing three and I had not been paid for my Sunday which I worked. Every other time I called they made up an excuse for the manager to not talk to me.

Another week passes and on the Sunday of that week I've had it and call up to see what was going on with my pay. X picks up and I say
"Hello x, Just wondering when I was getting paid for my shi-"

X cuts me off.

"Yeh, it'll be there on Thursday of this week" She replies with an annoyed and rude tone.

I choke up offended at the way X says this and feel shy.

"WHat else did you want?" X says bluntly.

"I was also wondering-"

She cuts me off again and says
"Yeah give me a minute" and puts the phone down. I hear X walk away and talk to someone before X comes back 5 minutes later and says
"What did you want again?"

"I was just wondering what my shifts were"

X replies bluntly again with

"Yeah you have none again this week."

X didn't even walk up to the room to check the shifts, as I could hear the registers going. She had just bluntly told me that I had no shifts.

A couple of weeks passed and I felt like their was no hope for me for another job as the timeline where you look for jobs had expired and everyone had already hired all their new staff. Then I get a call from Coles, which I had applied at two weeks before I had applied at this other store. They rangup and asked for an interview. I go in and they love me, laugh at my jokes and make comments about me coming to induction. Hopefully this meaning I have the job.

A couple of days pass and I hang out with my family friends who's friend is one of the assistant managers that work at my work. we'll call this one B

I like B she's very nice and doesn;t mind me being gay. She thinks I'm funny and she likes me. And Accepts who I am. The friend of the family who is friends with her was also an assistant manager at my work we'll call her M.

M tells me later on that night at my partner's house that she had spoken to B about my problem and what was happening with work and tells me that B had spoken to X about me asking what she had said to the store I had applied at.

M tells me that X had said to B that "I'm not giving her no shifts, using me as a reference."

And that apparently X had said something to the store I applied at that wasn't good on purpose cos X had the shits I was looking for another job. (SEEING AS SHE WASN'T GIVING ME ANY SHIFTS BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T LIKE ME NOW BECAUSE I'M GAY)

Coles tells me that they will call between friday and wednesday and it is now Monday. I'm hoping I will get the job, I cannot stand to work at my current employment, they are treating me like shit and my family and friends think I should talk to the HR about the way they are discriminating against me and treating me wrongly. I'm too scared to make this move at the moment , but my mum said she talked to my Aunty, who talked to her ex husband (hes some kind of lawyer or high up in business) he's my uncle Ivan. And that he was going to dig up some information and tell me what I should do and how I am going to do it, in the next couple of days or so.

My fingers are crossed for this job at coles, so please cross your fingers for me too.

Discrimination is wrong and no one should be subjected to it. I am deeply hurt and offended and feel as if I am being bullied in the workplace and that I have no rights when I am there. I feel alienated and isolated and is making it hard to concentrate in school because I have bad anxiety, and cannot stop thinking about what is going to happen.

Please let's hope that their will be a good turn around or something good will happen. Because the way this is going is making it feel darker and gloomier every day.

And yes that is my big depressive update for what I've been thinking about for the past 3 and a half weeks.

-Barbie.